My daughter goes to a playgroup every Friday. The Mom’s sit in a really cool observation room behind a police like mirror two way glass where we can see & hear our little angels in action but they are none the wiser that we are watching. The Mom’s all talk about general Mom stuff and somewhere along the line I mentioned that we adopted Livi from Russia. This past week this one Mom asked me about our adoption… at first her questions were the general type “was it a hard process?” and such… the curious questions that almost everyone has. But then our casual conversation turned into a serious one when this Mom poured her heart out to me and explained that she relinquished a child 10 years ago and is involved in an open adoption.


What a blessing this conversation was… we candidly discussed our feelings on adoption from an adoptive Mom’s perspective and a Birth Mom’s perspective. She offered great advice on how to talk to Livi and I was able to learn so much from this conversation that lasted about an hour. She shared that not a day goes by that she does not think about her first son, she talked about the pain of her choice but how she never regretted it. She went on to briefly talk about how it has affected the way she parents her other children and I was impressed with how positive her attitude is about adoption.


I admitted to this practical stranger my innermost fears and preconceived notions about open adoption and how that propelled me into international adoption. She validated me, my choices and I thanked her for sharing her story and giving me a new perspective. This may sound silly and I know not every birth/first Mom has had such a positive story but I more connected to Livi’s birth mom after this conversation. I don’t believe in accidents… that hour long talk was a real blessing.