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I took a teen daughter to therapy today. This particular daughter is one of the most angry kids to have come into our family and the therapist (and us) has work cut out for her! My daughter’s previous adoptive parents – and professionals that they’d used – felt that this girl might have borderline personality disorder. Today, our own therapist confirmed this as a possibility. It was at least confirmed that much of what we are dealing with are behaviors that someone with BPD might show.
This is not my first experience with borderline personality disorder. This very same therapist worked with me with a now-grown daughter (Erica) who was literally vicious with “her stuff”. (This therapist pointed out that a main difference between the two is that Erica loved me…not so this time around. Yet? Pretty accurate.)
Even though I’ve been down this road before, I ventured onto the internet to do some refresher reading. The name of this disorder really is a little misleading. What it sounds like and what it really is can be quite different. It’s scary…but at least having this knowledge can help me find ways to help her. Here’s some of what I’ve found:
What is Borderline personality disorder?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual’s sense of self-identity. Originally thought to be at the “borderline” of psychosis, people with BPD suffer from a disorder of emotion regulation. While less well known than schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), BPD is more common, affecting 2 percent of adults, mostly young women. There is a high rate of self-injury without suicide intent, as well as a significant rate of suicide attempts and completed suicide in severe cases. Patients often need extensive mental health services, and account for 20 percent of psychiatric hospitalizations. Yet, with help, many improve over time and are eventually able to lead productive lives.
What are the symptoms of borderline personality disorder?
While a person with depression or bipolar disorder typically endures the same mood for weeks, a person with BPD may experience intense bouts of anger, depression, and anxiety that may last only hours, or at most a day. These may be associated with episodes of impulsive aggression, self-injury, and drug or alcohol abuse. Distortions in cognition and sense of self can lead to frequent changes in long-term goals, career plans, jobs, friendships, gender identity, and values. Sometimes people with BPD view themselves as fundamentally bad, or unworthy. They may feel unfairly misunderstood or mistreated, bored, empty, and have little idea who they are. Such symptoms are most acute when people with BPD feel isolated and lacking in social support, and may result in frantic efforts to avoid being alone.
People with BPD often have highly unstable patterns of social relationships. While they can develop intense but stormy attachments, their attitudes towards family, friends, and loved ones may suddenly shift from idealization (great admiration and love) to devaluation (intense anger and dislike). Thus, they may form an immediate attachment and idealize the other person, but when a slight separation or conflict occurs, they switch unexpectedly to the other extreme and angrily accuse the other person of not caring for them at all. Even with family members, individuals with BPD are highly sensitive to rejection, reacting with anger and distress to such mild separations as a vacation, a business trip, or a sudden change in plans. These fears of abandonment seem to be related to difficulties feeling emotionally connected to important persons when they are physically absent, leaving the individual with BPD feeling lost and perhaps worthless. Suicide threats and attempts may occur along with anger at perceived abandonment and disappointments.
People with BPD exhibit other impulsive behaviors, such as excessive spending, binge eating and risky sex. BPD often occurs together with other psychiatric problems, particularly bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety disorders, substance abuse, and other personality disorders.
For more information on Borderline Personality Disorder:
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/bpd.cfm
Theresa – I have always defined BPD as “People who happily drift from crisis to crisis leaving a trail of emotional corpses in their wake. Just a definition from the MoM of a BPD with another budding on the horizon.