Part 1
Part 2

So, what are the options? Some have suggested that we disrupt his adoption back to the state. We *could* do this, but we won’t for two big reasons. First of all, in our state, disrupting an adoption back to the state results in automatic legal charges for the parents! If he were a birth child that we turned custody to the state, we would not be charged. However, oddly, as adoptive parents, that is the law. Secondly, right now, we have a boy involved in the system with parents to advocate for him. If we disrupt to the state, we have a boy in the system with noone to speak for him. (For information purposes, if we were to disrupt the adoption of John privately to another family, there would be no charges. This discrepancy is the case in several states. I am not opposed to disruption for families who have reached this point, not by any means. We have adopted 12 children in primarily similar situations. Should you choose to adopt or disrupt, please check the laws of your state.)

We *could* bring him home and give it a try. We’ve been advised that it will be a short matter of time before we then are charged with failure to protect the other children. Can’t win either way. Bring home home, get charged with failure to protect. Refuse to bring him home, get charged with abandonment and neglect.

Sometimes I just sit and think. I have two choices, both of which result in being charged with breaking the law?? What did I do?? I adopted a child who had mental illness. I promised to be there for him and get him the help he needed, in spite of the immense work that has been from the very beginning. Didn’t I do something good here? Not that I adopted this child, nor any other, for the accolades!! Yet, I certainly didn’t figure it would cause me to become a criminal just in the doing!

So, we will file the appeal package. We will hope that somehow we are able to convince the powers that be (most never having lived with a mentally ill person) to allow my son to get the help that he needs. I will hope that I don’t have to get arrested again.