What if all of the parents that ever parented an adopted child actually united in honor of the adopted child's first parents? What if we all united in honor of one another? Gasp! What a concept. How remarkable would that be?

It is powerful when a group presumed to have more power than another group acts, works, speaks, struggles in unison with the less powerful group. There is something that makes you take notice when groups with seemingly disparate interests band together in the name of a just and worthy cause. That has been the case in political, economic, religious, and social conflicts. Could the same thing happen among adoptive, foster, biological and other mothers of adopted children?

I am an adoptive mother and very proud to be one. I have no regrets and no apologies to make to anyone about choosing to add to my family through adoption. But my daughters had two other mothers before I ever came on the scene. The woman who gave birth to them will always be their mother. Their real mother. The incredible therapeutic foster mother who raised both of them from the moment the first one came home from the hospital and then the second one a year later will always be their mother. Their real mother. And make no mistake about it, I will always be their mother. Their real mother.

In the current popular literature there is this manufactured squabble going on that has been termed "The Mommy Wars" between stay at home moms (SAHM) and working mothers. The whole thought of mothers going at each other's throats like this is appalling to me and I have written about it elsewhere. There is a current movement afoot to put an end to the Mommy Wars. You can read about it here.

I haven't figured it out yet, but I think it would be great if we started a grass roots movement to end the mommy war that exists among all the mothers of adopted children. How could a child have too much love? Can someone answer that for me?

I am an African-American woman and I am a descendant of enslaved Africans whose famlies were split asunder and reformed time and again with strangers acting as mothers and fathers to children they did not even know. All of my children share this legacy as well. There was a time when African-American women were mothers and mother figures to all of America's children (and even their parents), particularly in the South. Of course, that is now an incendiary racial stereotype; still, it was a reality. I know there must be other cultures where children were raised and loved by many mothers either because of circumstance or by choice. All mothers...are real mothers. Can't we lower our defenses and our weapons long enough to see that in one another's eyes?