A Creative Solution

September 12th, 2011

1060980_wedding_ringsA good friend of mine, Jessica, adopted a child from China about ten years ago.  When Jessica's daughter was around four, she exhibited a lot of anxiety whenever Jessica left the house.  Jessica would want to pop out for a trip to the grocery store, coffee with her friends, or even a date with her husband, and her daughter would go into a rage, screaming and clinging to her mother, begging her not to leave her.  Jessica had two other children, neither of whom exhibited this behavior, and she was perplexed as to why her daughter would feel so insecure.  And why she would do it now when she hadn't been that way as an infant or toddler. She told me about the… [more]

Easing Into Post-Holiday Life

December 27th, 2009

1Easing Into Post-Holiday LifeLast year, we celebrated Beauty's first Christmas. I say her first Christmas because the year prior (2007--her real first Christmas at nine months of age), we celebrated as a family of three prior to her homecoming. There were a few reasons for this, most of which being that we didn't want to overwhelm her with the overpowering newness of transition blending with tradition. At nine months of age, we knew it wasn't the same thing as welcoming home a newborn just before the holidays arrived. We had a low-key Christmas Eve and Christmas Day since Beauty hadn't even hit the two week mark of her arrival in the U.S. by the time December 24 rolled around. It was nice… [more]

Toddler Tantrums: Beauty’s Acting Beastly

September 16th, 2009

Beauty's Pumpkin Patch TantrumI’ll admit it: my daughter, Beauty, has a Case of the Terrible Two’s. I say it with both relief and regret—relief that’s she’s developed into a two year old whose lust for independence has led her to push her limits, and regret because, well, a day without tantrums in this house has been a rarity as of late. And let’s face it, a house loaded with tantrums is not a pleasant place to be, even if it is a part of growing up and learning to stretch her wings of independence. Let me stop to clarify for a minute: tantrums, in certain forms, are completely acceptable in our home. It’s all a part of a child’s process of growing up… [more]

Temper Tantrums

February 17th, 2009

Our son Z is nine years old but really, emotionally, he is four. Confusing I know, but it is reality of raising a child who has been emotionally stunted by his past. Z can throw a tantrum unlike any child I have ever seen. In fact, I hope I never see another child throw a "Z Tantrum". Nothing about his behavior would indicate that he has graced the earth with his presence for a solid nine years. Z has thrown these fits since the beginning. Unlike T, Z never had a honeymoon period. His behaviors cropped up on his very first overnight visit. I have seen him throw tantrum after tantrum but nothing quite like his fit last weekend. Our family decided we would head… [more]

Behavior Tied to Growth Spurts?

February 16th, 2008

For some time now, I’ve observed that right around the time my oldest goes through a growth spurt, we start to see really wonky behavior: crankiness, sleeping more, eating like there’s no tomorrow, and the like. Though I saw, and still see, this with him, being that he was our only child, it didn’t occur to me to look for this same tie-in with our newest arrivals. But, boy, something is definitely in the air! My youngest has shown signs of regressing to certain behaviors we’ve not seen since shortly after his arrival here. He’s throwing mild tantrums, and being whiny, clingy and verbally very cranky. My daughter, who lost another tooth today, has also displayed some undesirable traits that appear to be growth-related. She, too, has been rude… [more]

Lets get ready to rumble

March 21st, 2007
Categories: Tantrums

In this corner we have Livi- Aka the powerful princess weighing in at 30 lbs. This reining champion of the toddler world is fast, smart and sneaky. Cute as a button she can charm her opponent with a sly little smile. This beauty is known to outwit and outrun her opponent against the ropes. Undefeated and undeniably cute. And In this Corner we have Lauri Aka Mama, Mommy or Mom. Weighing in at 132 lbs and in need of fresh manicure and a good haircut. This Mom is relatively new to the parenting scene and is no match for the powerful toddler. She will attempt to outwit her challenger with her limited parenting skills and is known to bribe with suckers. Who will win this… [more]

Terrible Tantrums

March 13th, 2007
Categories: Tantrums

My daughter has been testing my capacity for patience lately. I consider myself pretty easy going, laid back, not too high strung. I seem to have zero patience these days. My daughter is a toddler who’s newest favorite words are No and Mine. She says no for everything, even for something she wants. She will say ask for Juice, I give her juice she screams “No Juice” so I take it away and she screams “ Juice” again… this scene plays itself out over every little thing these days . She turns the smallest thing into a power struggle and tantrum. While I know better than to get caught up in that game I’m only human and even the most serene and… [more]

Love Thursday – The Purple Ball

March 1st, 2007
Categories: Tantrums

When I take Livi shopping I typically allow her to hold something while shopping in the store to keep her occupied. I will typically grab something from the baby or toy section- something that makes noise and that will keep her busy. Then before leaving we go and put it back and we have never had any issues with this system until the purple ball. We say bye-bye toy and off we go to check out. Recently I allowed her to carry a purple ball while shopping because she recently learned to recognize her colors and purple just happens to be her favorite. She carried it, bounced it, and rolled it while I shopped. Then according to plan we went to say… [more]