Celebrating Family

July 6th, 2011

paper_family_ii-I love the word family and how it has evolved. 50 years ago, if we would have asked a group of people what a family was it would have been such a boring answer. "A dad, a Mom, and 2.5 children." Maybe they would have gotten really crazy and added a pet. I love the fact that we are living in a generation where all families can be accepted. I was a young mom. I had my first son at 19 and decided to become a solo parent. His biological father was not the kind of person that I wanted to influence my child so I figured that me alone was better than us together. It was the best decision that I… [more]

Happy Father’s Day!

June 19th, 2011

645389_father_and_sonIt's Father's Day and across the country dads are opening up presents: ties, barbecue tools, car gadgets, the latest technological mechanism guaranteed to make their life easier.  Or perhaps they are going to spend the day on the golf course--after breakfast in bed, no doubt!  Whatever it is, I hope all dads get to celebrate. I've made this observation before, but it seems that the adoption literature is full of stories written by adoptive mothers.  We hear their voices and know their perspective.  No doubt it has to do with the fact that when it comes to adoption, often it is the woman who is the driving force. But what of adoptive fathers?  Who are these men who willingly go along with their wives… [more]

Re-establishing Daily Routine

January 29th, 2010

518984_a_little_girl_saying_good_night_1The holidays have come and gone. If you're anything like me, I'm still not back to my normal routine. I feel that I'm almost there, but not quite. It's hard to wrap my head around a whole new year, and the fact that my vacation is over. Reality is calling, and I'm trying not to answer. Chances are you and your children may be experiencing the same thing. The holidays were a busy time of year. It was filled with get-togethers, obscenely early shopping trips, delicious sugary treats, and time off of work and school. It was a time of year to be enjoyed and cherished. But once it's over, it's time to get back to your daily routine. While it may be… [more]

Adoptive Parenting and the Stay-at-Home Mom

October 21st, 2009

Adoptive Parenting and the Stay-at-Home MomI am a stay-at-home mom. I briefly mentioned as such in a blog I wrote for "adoptive parenting" earlier today, in fact, and felt compelled to expound a bit on this topic this evening. I say it proudly: I am a stay-at-home mom. I love it. I love it more than I ever thought possible. I love it with a fierce intensity. Yes, I love it. Here's what I don't love, though: the fact that it was seemingly expected. After all, we adopted a baby. I've had this conversation with so, so many of my adoptive mom friends at some point in time--some stay-at-home moms (SAHM), some work-at-home moms (WAHM), and some working moms (outside the home)--and the… [more]

What Does “Adoptive Parenting” Mean Anyway?

October 7th, 2009

Biological parenting this way, adoptive parenting that wayA few weeks back, I had a quick cup of coffee with a dear friend of mine. We did the usually "catch up" convos; we talked about our families, reminisced about the "old days", and laughed a lot. I mentioned in passing that I was writing for AdoptionBlogs, and a conversation of interest ensued. Basically, she understood how I'd be engrossed in writing about international adoption and Guatemala (two subjects so very near to my heart), but she didn't quite "get" the whole adoptive parenting issue. "What," she posed, "does 'adoptive parenting' even mean? And how is it different from 'regular' parenting?" Tricky. You know, the short answer is that I honestly never really thought about defining… [more]

What About Adoptive Dads?

May 21st, 2007
Categories: Adoptive Dads

dadMost blogs seem to be targeted toward women. It seems that women are the most likely to read blogs and to seek out information and support on adoptive parenting. What about information for the dads?? I recently discovered a new (to me) website just for dads. An internet article shares “GreatDad.com enables all dads - working, stay-at-home, single, adoptive, …- to find ways to be involved and understand how dads are functioning as parents today. The new tool makes this process easier within a parenting environment specifically focused on fathers." The website is colorful and easy to use. The headline is great: great Dad.com – Because Dads don’t always think like moms. The homepage has… [more]

An Adoptive Dad’s Birthday

May 1st, 2007
Categories: Adoptive Dads

balloonsToday brought a birthday celebration at our house. Dad is now 40. He’s “officially old”, according to the kids. Normally, we have low-key celebrations for birthdays. I love to celebrate a day as important as a person’s birth. However, as with most other holidays, my kids don’t handle big celebrations. For a birthday as momentous as “the big 4-0” AND since it was for dad, not a child, I broke our unwritten rule and went for a slightly bigger celebration. I worked hard to think of something noteworthy for a fortieth birthday celebration, but still mellow enough to hit under the “yikes radar” of the kids. So, how did I do? Not so well. I was… [more]

Love Thursday- Fathers & Daughters

February 1st, 2007
Categories: Adoptive Dads

Livi & papa Happy Love Thursday everyone. Thursdays are getting harder for me as we now have our little OT toddler playgroup every Thursday. It takes some planning now to make sure I get you a picture. Often for Love Thursday I browse at my file of most recent pictures and see which one speaks to me, which one I can easily share a story about and of course which one is the cutest. I have said this before but my daughter is a Mama’s girl, and while it’s draining at times I love every minute of it. My poor husband has had to wait for Livi to come around, to show affection and to bond with him. It took some time… [more]

Love Thursday- Papa’s Girl

January 11th, 2007
Categories: Adoptive Dads

It’s a wonderful thing watching my husband and daughter together, while I do think that Livi is officially a Mama’s girl, she has a special place in her heart for her Papa. They have a special bond. At times I don’t think its easy on him when she just wants me. I think at times he feels like the odd man out in a house of estrogen, even the cat is a moody female. He has been great, sitting back and waiting for his turn. Allowing her to bond with me first.He is so patient with her and allows her to come around on her terms. Seeing their relationship develop has been a joy.Watching him melt with the… [more]

Let’s Hear From the Dads!

April 10th, 2006
Categories: Adoptive Dads

Browsing back through all of my posts, I see that nearly every one of them has been written from the perspective of the adoptive mother. The only post that I have written on the unique issues related to adoptive fathering was this one about non-biological children carrying on the adoptive father's name. It may be fine to write what you know, but, if you stick with that tenet then sooner or later you won't have much of anything left to write about. I could do a lot of tedious online research to locate articles on adoptive dads. Eventually, I will probably do that. Right now, I'd be more interested to hear from adoptive dads directly. I'd like to hear a father's perspective on adoption… [more]