Most people probably think of “first” as being experienced by older children who are adopted internationally. Obviously, with coming to a new country, everything would be new, intriguing, and scary. Actually, the experience can be very similar for a foster child who has experienced extreme neglect. The foster child will experience many first, upon arriving to a new family.

Our daughter, Lyn, came to live with us a few weeks before her fourth birthday. In her birth home, she, her brother, and four sisters were rarely... more

There is much discussion over whether it’s more difficult to parent a child of neglect or a child from abuse. I have dealt with children with both a history of child neglect and child abuse. They are both challenging, but in many ways, the neglected child is more difficult.

Children learning bonding and trust within the first two years of life. This is done by their parents or primary caregivers responding to their needs. In the case of child abuse, the child’s needs are sometimes met, sometimes not met, and sometimes... more

This morning, I read the Foster Care Blog and saw that Bill wrote about Child Abuse Awareness Month that is coming up next month. Child abuse is such a heart wrenching topic, isn't it? Aren't our hearts just ripped right out of our chests when we read about, hear about, work with, treat, care for the children of abuse? Child abuse takes an incredible toll on our society at every level. It often feels like not enough can ever be done to make a significant impact on the problem.

There is a lot of discussion... more

My new blogger friend Shar (and I swear to you I did not pay her to say those lovely things about me on her blog!) has been posting on her blog about the unique needs of children who have been sexually abused. I left a comment on one of her posts mentioning my concern that foster parents, adoptive parents, and others responsible for the care of sexually abused children tend to have a knee-jerk "don't touch" reaction in caring for them. This response is understandable.

There is a fear that a child with a history of sexual... more