May is National Foster Care Month. This week, our state had a celebration called the “Blue Ribbon Event” in honor. "The Blue Ribbon Event brings together foster and adoptive families, CPS and DES workers, CASA’s and Foster Care Review Board Members, licensing workers and a variety of child welfare workers to tie one ribbon for each child in Arizona’s foster care system." (AZAFAP Organization)

My family attended and participated. We tied blue ribbons in a downtown area, were... more

Today is a birthday day at our house!

What do you do to celebrate birthdays at your house? I’ve found that birthday traditions are an important way of bonding a family together. My adopted children, in particular, seem to respond to our birthday celebrations – once it “happens to them”, it helps to cement their belonging in our family.

Traditions bring families together. The funny thing is that it doesn’t even have to be a positive “tradition” to bring families together! Even a neutral thing that happens the... more

For Mother's Day, remember yourself.

This is a hard suggestion for me to follow. It's opposite of many other suggestions that even I've given this year - before I realized I was WRONG.

I have learned to minimize my Mother’s Days since adopting my children. With all of their "mother issues", and because of all of these acting out concerns, it seems easier to “not have a Mother’s Day” than to offer the kids more reminders of all of the other mothers in their past and of their grief/loss issues.

This year, I realized that this... more

Many adopted children struggle with Mother’s Day issues. Some of the reasons for various feelings have been discussed in other blogs.

We know that adopted children may act out. So, what should we do about it? What can we do to help the child and to help our family?

1. Be aware.

Knowledge is power. We’ve all heard that before. Even so, it’s true. Knowing that our child might act out, that this is a possibility,... more

It has started.

My children are aware of the impending Day for Mothers.

Tension is tangible; behaviors have taken a veering right from whatever normal we’d managed to achieve by last month.

One girl wanted to mail a previous adoptive mother a card. She realized today that she’d forgotten about this up until now. With this realization, she was even able to use words (something many of my other children are not able to do). “I forgot to mail a card! X*#?!” With the utterance of a swear word, it seemed to flip a switch controlling... more

What do Moms really want for Mother's day? If you would have asked me prior to coming home with my daughter what I would like to receive for a Mother’s day gift I probably would have rattled off something like- Breakfast in bed, brunch, flowers, Mom jewelry, a special dinner and a nice card .

Those are just a few ideas that I think about when I think about Mother’s day. Today that is far from my mind as Mother’s Day approaches. So what do Moms really want? I can tell you what I would love to receive on that special day set aside to honor... more

Everyone loves a genuine celebration! What days do you celebrate with your adopted child?

Birthdays are an obvious choice. I love to celebrate the day of my child’s birth. Sometimes, especially with older kids who have memories of unpleasant birthdays in the past, they are nervous about celebrating birthdays. Sometimes kids will act up a LOT in anticipation of the birthday. I’ve known some parents who might say “Fine. Then we will not celebrate the birthday.” – or maybe just that they won’t have a party or gifts. I can understand... more

Last night, I shopped at WalMart. That alone is not a shocker; I go to WalMart 2-3 times every week. This time, however, there was a little surprise waiting for me.

I had three adopted children with me. We bought some batteries, a child’s birthday toy, and a 4th grader’s needed blue binder. Next, a giant row of Mother’s Day cards hit us nearly flat upside the head. I can’t answer for my kids, but for myself, it felt like a 2x4 across the head/chest and it took my breath away. I’m not sure why I wasn't more ready. Perhaps calendaring is becoming less... more

It’s Easter Egg Day at our house. My 4yr old has asked us about Easter Egg Day at least a hundred times over the last week. He’s excited in such a major way that you can’t help but smile over his joy. At the same time that Joey is so excited, our house also has plenty of another kind of excitement. Flowing freely through the house air are enormous loads of anxiety. All of this anxiety shows forth in as many behaviors (or more) as there are children feeling flush with it.

Why so much anxiety? Adoptive parents often could find themselves... more

Its Love Thursday again... already. Like all Love Thursdays I begin by browsing my picture files and seeing which Photo pops out at me. What will I post for Love Thursday today? There were many cute Easter Egg hunt photos to choose from, I have many pictures of my daughter decorating easter eggs, cute pics with the really tiny teenage girl in a really old super big and really ugly bunny suit. Pictures of My daughter just fascinated by that big ugly bunny. Then there are the pictures of our recently completed Good Wish quilt and scrapbook. I... more