I am two! Can you believe that it is already that time again? It is time to write our semi-annual Dear Birth Mom letter and update. The months seem to fly by unbelievably fast and it has already been six months since our last update. Our darling daughter has just turned two years old. It seems like just yesterday I was rushing to Texas to meet her for the first time. Now, she is the one rushing, in every direction at once most of the time. She has been transformed from an enchanting little baby to a beautiful little girl in two years.

Dear Birth Mom,

Now... more

My oldest turns 10 this week – Double Digits. In anticipation, he's been educating the two youngest on the Intricacies of Being a 'Tween. Every morning you'll find him coming up with new “rules” or facts about what 10-year-olds like or dislike, do or don't do.

He started out by telling them he would be spending more time in his room. He said he'd most likely start watching much less of channels like Sprout with them. He explained that he, instead, would be up for more mature fare, such as movies for 'Tweens like Jump In.

He told them he might... more

For many of us, Mother’s Day is not the day we had dreamed of when we started out our parenting journey. We don’t have children rushing to us with hugs and fists full of flowers. We aren’t greeted with “I love you” or children wanting to make the day perfect for us.

Many of my days started with my son throwing a huge fit, possibly literally throwing things, cursing at me and other equally fun things. At some point in my parenting journey, I stopped making the day about making my kids feel good about having me for a mom, and instead I celebrate making... more

When I was going through the home study process, my social worker told me to read several books about adoption. One of these books talked about birthdays being a sad time for adopted children. According to the author, for children placed for adoption as a newborn, a child's birthday is also the day that his birthmother "abandoned" him. The author said to keep an eye out for bad behavior around a child's birthday because this could indicate that a child is struggling with adoption issues. The child might... more

My son recently had a birthday. He attends a Montessori school, where birthdays are a really big deal.

Montessori schools have an entire program set up for birthday celebrations. The children sit in a big circle. In the middle of the circle is something to represent the sun. Index cards with the months of the year are placed around the sun. The birthday child holds a globe and circles the sun to represent one year of his life. Meanwhile, the class sings a song about each year. The child stops after each year, and the parent shares stories and pictures of the child... more

I hope that all of my adoptive family readers are having a very Merry Christmas today. I also send good wishes to other members of the adoption triad as well as those of you who celebrate other holidays at this time of year. Foster children are also in my thoughts today. I hope that every foster child will spend next Christmas with his or her forever family.

Christmas is a good time to reflect upon the joy of being an adoptive family. I spent four empty Christmases longing for a child. No matter how nice the gifts or how delicious the food,... more

If you adopted an older child, your child might misbehave around the holidays. While most children get more excitable as the holidays approach, some older adopted children might become withdrawn or irritable. This behavior can baffle some adoptive parents because the holidays are generally seen as a time of joy for children.

Children who have experienced pain and/or trauma can react to Christmas much differently from other children. When the child sees the Christmas tree, she might be reminded of experiencing abuse at this time of year, possibly in front of another... more

Father’s Day is coming quickly! What are your plans? How will your adopted child honor the fathers in his life?

Around Mother’s Day, there were many blogs posted about all of the many issues that challenged adopted children during the “season” of Mother’s Day. For some reason, this doesn’t seem to be the case for Father’s Day. At least, within my own family, and in our experiences thus far, there have been far fewer troublesome issues surrounding Father’s Day.

This leaves us all more open and able to celebrate and honor the fathers... more

Please join me and my family in sending a thankyou to our troops this weekend. Regardless of your feelings about what we are doing overseas, we can agree that a lot of very brave young men and women have sacrificed their time and themselves in service to us and our country.

Take some time with your children to teach them what this holiday is about, a day for a “memorial”. As we gather for the barbeques and pool parties, lets help our children understand and show respect for the many people in our country who have sacrificed everything,... more

May is National Foster Care Month. "All children deserve and benefit from enduring, positive relationships with caring adults. The same is true for the 513,000 American youth in foster care. These young people have a special need to make connections with nurturing adults because their own families are in crisis. Many require secure, stable places to call home until they can either safely reunite with their parent or establish other lifelong family relationships." (from a... more